A New Beginning to Old Life

Here I am; I'm back again.
This rusty blade's become my sin.
As I defile my own skin...
I feel the demons start to grin.

Here I am; I'm better now.
I've seemed to stop it all somehow.
To those who look and lift a brow..
I've stopped forever; It's my vow.

Here I am; Filled with cheap drugs.
I scratch my arms to kill these bugs.
I soon turn sober; shoulder shrugs.
I'm just an outlet; these are my plugs.

Here I am; Been clean five years.
My conscious suddenly appears.
I see my mother shed her tears.
Her son has ridden of her fears.

Here I am; a gun in hand.
They've gave me their official brand.
As I protect my newfound land.
I feel a pain I can't withstand.

Here I am; the scars remain.
Reminders of a certain pain.
What's driven me the most insane..
Is blistering shatters of outside rain.

Here I am; I thought we were fine.
Provocative callings came from her waistline...
I found out that I could no longer decline...
I've defiled this beauty that once was divine.

Here I am; My son by my side.
Questions come from him; My eyes open wide.
He asked my life story; I simply replied:
"All that matters is that I had tried."

Here I am; the happiest I've been.
No drugs, no gangs, no pain, no gin.
I look to my child and lift up his chin;
"This is where my life will truly begin".